Divorces can often leave both spouses wondering if they have been taken advantage of. If you find yourself asking, “Can my husband legally withhold money from me?” then it’s likely that you have valid concerns to consider. Divorce often results in a reversal of the economic benefits that come with marriage, where two people support one household. However, financial abuse is a real concern, especially for women. In this article, we’ll explore the factors that determine if your spouse can withhold money from you and provide insights to help you navigate this challenging situation.
Can My Spouse Legally Withhold Money From Me?
The short answer to this question is, “It depends.” There are several factors to consider, such as whether your spouse can claim the money as separate property, your legal rights to the money, and the state you reside in. However, it’s essential to focus on the bigger picture and ask yourself what your options are, how to take care of yourself, and what might be happening behind the scenes that you’re unaware of. Simply put, if you’re asking this question, it likely indicates more significant issues at hand. Let’s explore why financial abuse is more prevalent among women.
Why Financial Abuse May Occur More Often Among Women
While there aren’t precise statistics on whether women are more likely to be victims of financial abuse in a marriage, anecdotal evidence suggests that searches like “Can my husband legally withhold money from me?” are more common than their counterpart, “Can my wife legally withhold money from me?” Here are five reasons why this might be the case:
1. Financial abuse is highly correlated with domestic violence and affects women more.
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, between 94% and 99% of domestic violence survivors also experience financial abuse. Women are more likely to encounter domestic violence in all its forms.
2. Men often take charge of financial planning in marriages.
Studies show that many high net worth women defer long-term financial decisions to their spouses. This lack of involvement can lead to unaddressed financial needs and vulnerability to economic abuse, with retirement planning, long-term care, and insurance being the top concerns.
3. Women tend to focus on non-financial responsibilities in the household.
In many marriages, women traditionally take on tasks such as raising children, managing the household, and balancing career and family duties. This division of labor often results in men assuming financial responsibilities and making financial decisions.
4. Men are generally more interested in financial matters.
Although efforts have been made to attract women to the financial services industry, it remains predominantly male-oriented. Men have shown a higher inclination and interest in financial planning and investments, making them more likely to handle money matters in a marriage.
5. Men are often the primary breadwinners in one-income households.
According to recent U.S. census data, one-income households are more likely to have husbands as the primary earners. This economic disparity can create an unbalanced power dynamic, making it easier for husbands to withhold money from their wives.
As we delve deeper into the question of whether your spouse can withhold money from you, the critical consideration is whether the money is considered marital or separate property.
Marital Property vs. Separate Property
Marital property refers to assets acquired or shared during the marriage, while separate property pertains to assets brought into the marriage or acquired separately. Understanding these distinctions is crucial in determining your rights to the money. Here are some examples:
Marital Property Example
A joint bank account opened in both spouses’ names, funded by their combined incomes, is an example of marital property. In a divorce, this account is subject to equitable distribution.
Separate Property Example
A life insurance policy inherited solely by one spouse before the marriage and maintained in a separate account is considered separate property. It is typically excluded from divorce proceedings.
Common Arguments Over Property
In cases where one spouse withholds financial resources, disputes often arise regarding whether the property is marital or separate. Here are some common justifications or reasons given by the withholding spouse:
Argument #1: I earned this money, so it’s mine.
This justification may be a form of financial abuse, often used as an intimidation tactic by the primary earner. However, specific circumstances can make this claim more complex, requiring the expertise of a divorce planning professional.
Argument #2: I had this money before we got married, so it’s mine.
Money brought into a marriage remains separate property as long as it is not commingled with marital assets. Commingling occurs when separate property is mixed with marital property, making it more challenging to claim as separate.
Argument #3: I inherited this money, and it wasn’t intended for you.
If the inheritance remains separate and is not commingled with marital assets, it is likely separate property. Once mixed with other marital assets, it becomes subject to division.
Argument #4: This money is in a separate account in my name only.
Merely owning a separate account does not automatically make its contents separate property. If funds in the account were earned during the marriage, they might be considered marital property, regardless of the account’s name.
Argument #5: I earned this money after we separated and decided to keep our finances separate.
This argument may be valid, depending on the terms of any separation or support agreements and the final divorce decree.
Community Property States vs. Equitable Distribution States
To complicate matters further, differences in state laws govern the division of assets during divorce.
Equitable Distribution States
Most states follow the principle of equitable distribution, which aims to divide assets fairly based on the spouses’ circumstances and negotiation during divorce proceedings. Equitable distribution does not necessarily mean an equal split of assets.
Community Property States
In community property states, all marital property is divided equally, regardless of property type. Nine states adhere to community property laws: Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Washington, and Wisconsin. Separate property is generally not subject to the 50/50 split.
Considering these factors, it is essential to determine if your spouse is illegally withholding money from you, which constitutes financial abuse.
What Is Financial Abuse?
Financial abuse occurs when one spouse controls the other’s access to economic resources, such as preventing them from making financial decisions or sustaining financial independence. Recognizing financial abuse is crucial because it often accompanies other forms of domestic violence, and victims may remain financially dependent on their abusers.
Signs of Financial Abuse
Financial abuse manifests in different ways, all aimed at reducing a victim’s independence and maintaining control. Here are some signs to watch out for:
Employment-Related Abuse
- Sabotaging employment opportunities.
- Stalking the victim at work.
- Preventing access to resources for job search.
- Demanding the victim stop working or searching for work.
Forcing the Victim Into Unwanted Debt
- Opening credit cards in the victim’s name without consent.
- Identity theft or using the victim’s personal information.
- Forcing the victim to take loans or sign financial documents against their will.
- Refinancing mortgages or car loans without the victim’s knowledge.
- Coercing the victim into making credit-related decisions.
Restricting or Preventing Access to Funds
- Controlling all financial decisions.
- Giving the victim an allowance.
- Using joint accounts to spend excessively.
- Prohibiting the spouse from being involved in financial matters.
- Manipulating the victim’s benefits or demanding money from them.
- Titling assets in the abuser’s name or hiding assets.
If you are experiencing any of these signs, it is crucial to take action for your safety and well-being. Seek support from organizations such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-SAFE) and develop a plan to remove yourself from the abusive situation.
Steps to Consider
If you are not in immediate danger, here are some steps to consider:
- Open your own bank account.
- Close joint credit cards and maintain a credit card in your name.
- Check your credit history for any unauthorized accounts.
- Consult with a family law attorney, who can provide guidance and, if needed, refer you to pro bono legal help.
- Make copies of essential documents, such as financial statements, insurance policies, and estate planning documents.
- Establish a separate mailing address.
- Change passwords for your online accounts.
Remember, it is essential to prioritize your safety and seek professional assistance to navigate the legal and emotional challenges of financial abuse.
In conclusion, while the legal aspects of money withholding depend on various factors, it is crucial to address the larger issue of financial abuse. By recognizing the signs, understanding your rights, and seeking support, you can take steps towards regaining control and creating a better future for yourself and your loved ones.
